Food Fright, Part 16
Uncle Andrew
I snapped this picture in my local grocery store earlier in the week. Where to begin, where to begin….
First of all, one wouldn’t think that Oreos and organic anything would be capable of peaceful coexistence on the same shelf, much less the same cookie. I would have thought that such an endeavor would be like handing a thirsty vampire a glass of holy water. Upon introduction of the offending additives, you’d expect the cookie to emit an anguished squeal and hurl itself bodily out of the baking tray, like the alien-contaminated blood sample in John Carpenter’s The Thing. (Off topic: did you know that The Thing was banned in Finland when it first came out? Whoda thunk. It’s amazing the kind of useless crap you can learn whilst trawling for a hyperlink to reference.)
Secondly, what marketing genius decided that what Oreos really needed was organic ingredients anyway? What’s next, animal-testing-free rat poison? Fair Trade Certified hollow-point bullets? Dolphin Safe Strontium 90?
At 160 calories and 7 fat grams per cookie, you’d be better off eating the strontium.
Junk food is junk food, and nothing in the cookie arena is junkier than an Oreo. And that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with letting a little junk food into your life. Just don’t let it get out of hand. To this common-sense proclamation I would add a codicil: don’t try to tart up your junk food and pretend it’s something it’s not. Like healthy. Or good for the planet. Or even food, really.
I am reminded of that sage old adage, “You can’t polish a turd”.
4 Responses to “Food Fright, Part 16”
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April 4th, 2007 at 8:22 am
See I was expecting you to go in a totally different direction on this one. Something about Organic ingredients in the cream filling and the splash of… milk… pictured on the box.
I really need to get out more…
April 4th, 2007 at 8:33 am
“Made with Orgasmic Flour and Sugar”???
Geez, get your mind out of the gutter…. 😆
April 4th, 2007 at 10:45 am
I wonder how long until we have organic Twinkies and ding-dongs. I love the “with organic ingredients” scam, 2 out of what, 50 listed ingredients are organic? The ideocracy is now
April 4th, 2007 at 11:08 am
Here are the ingredients in a regular Oreo:
Nabisco doesn’t yet have the ingredients of the “organic” Oreo available online. Frankly, I’m surprised that the list seems as innocuous as it does. I’d love to see what the ingredient list looked like in the 50’s, the heyday of “Better Living Through Chemistry”. 😯