8/7/2007

Recently Sighted

Uncle AndrewUncle Andrew
Filed under: @ 7:48 am

Wild Salmon Patties

Shot this at the QFC the other day.

*Sigh* You know, time was the waterways of the Puget Sound region were aswarm with shoals of gamboling wild salmon patties. During the spawning season you could visit just about any waterway and see the little fellers struggling valiantly against the current, while black and brown bears lined the wild rivers and streams, massive paws extended, hamburger buns at the ready. It was a sight to behold, and one of the things that first drew me to the beautiful, sylvan territory of the Pacific Northwest. Well, that and the fact that Evergreen was the only college that would take me.

Sadly, those days has passed, perhaps forever.

Some say the wild patties’ numbers have dwindled due to overharvesting; others cite the destruction of their habitat and the life-giving Tartar Moss that sustained them during their arduous journey to their ancient spawning grounds.

Me, I place the blame square on the shoulders of the commercial fish-patty farmers, and their unwitting introduction of a deadly competitor for resources: the salmon patties’ faster breeding, more aggressive cousin, the Filet-O-Fish.

2 Responses to “Recently Sighted”

  1. Tony Lenzer Says:

    I’m not so sure it’s the Filet-O-Fish that are causing the salmon patties to disappear, unless of course the former (voracious things that they are) are eating up the latter. As for your statement that Evergreen was the only college that would take you….rotten as you were at that age, I am sure that you might have gotten in at other institutions. For example, the University of Guam, a fine institution, even if thousands of miles from anywhere. As it happens, a former student of mine is an Administrator there, and I’ll bet we could have worked something out (!!)

  2. Uncle Andrew Says:

    I’m not so sure it’s the Filet-O-Fish that are causing the salmon patties to disappear, unless of course the former (voracious things that they are) are eating up the latter.

    That may be exactly what’s happening, but I think the Filets simply competing for resources and slowly edging out the more docile patty. For one thing, being cheaply made and widely distributed, they reproduce much faster.

    As it happens, a former student of mine is an Administrator there, and I’ll bet we could have worked something out (!!)

    THE FOLLOWING IS A JOKE, AND SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY

    Sorry, but anything on the Pacific Rim was still too close to home. 😉

    THE PRECEDING WAS A JOKE, AND SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN TAKEN SERIOUSLY

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