Brief Roomination
Uncle Andrew
I’ve been really busy lately, but I have a quick existential question for y’all before I take off for work:
If you are on the phone with your mail-order pharmacy, and you are waiting on hold to place an order, and the song they have chosen to play as their hold music is Jim Croce’s “Time in a Bottle“….are you still alive? Or have you instead died while waiting on hold, and this is your eternal punishment in the underworld?
5 Responses to “Brief Roomination”
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February 12th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
If you find yourself in this situation you may not be dead, but it may be time to get a life. 😀
February 12th, 2008 at 3:12 pm
Nah – Jim Croce isn’t on the eternal punishment soundtrack in the underworld (purgatory, maybe, but only if you really don’t like his music). But if you find yourself on hold on the phone to your pharmacy and they’re playing:
a) New Kids on the Block
b) Muzak versions of Metallica songs
c) any purported music with no sense of rhyme, musicality, or rhythm and with repeated references to bitches, hos, and various forms of violent death
d) Bob Dylan circa 2008 attempting to *sing* any of his music himself
…you’d better check the thermostat and your pulse. 😉 There are other, surer signs, but the gods know that any of the above don’t bode well for a harmonious afterlife.
February 13th, 2008 at 10:59 am
I’m on hold with my pharmacy, Dude: I’m trying to keep what life I have. 😛
Dalek: I’ll back the majority of your list, but i reserve the right to replace c) with any form of opera. 😮
February 19th, 2008 at 8:32 am
What makes you think that some opera doesn’t fit into c) already? Granted, the usages of bitches and/or hos are likely to be in the vernacular/slang of the era and not literal instances, but violent death is a popular theme, and goodness knows there have been enough composers in any century who couldn’t manage rhythm to save their lives. 😉
February 19th, 2008 at 9:39 am
Did you happen to catch, a few years back, a fascinating story on All Things Considered about the rise of rapper Eminem? Among other things, they did a comparison between his work and the classical “murder ballads” of yore. Very interesting stuff.
Still, opera….pfui. 😛