A Multitudinous Melange of Margaret

Filed under: @ 10:06 am

Couldn’t resist finishing this off today. I was so tired last night that I couldn’t keep my eyes from crossing, but I can’t stand keeping this around for much longer.

Amongst the pile of dreck that came in the mail yesterday I was oh so overjoyed to find the following:

Mal*Wart Credit Card envelope

Oh Frabdjous Day! I’ve been pre-qualified for a Wal-Mart Credit Card? What an honor! I’ll open immediately and see inside for details………

Mal*Wart Credit Card application

Now it is unlikely that you, dear readers, will be able to read the text. Allow me to elaborate “all the privileges that come with The Card!”

*3 cents off per gallon gas discount

Ooo! a whole 3 cents! Thanks, but I’d prefer to pay more per gallon for my gas and have some sort of assurance that the majority of the employees of the company from which I purchase my fuel are covered by health insurance that ISN’T Medicaid.

*Get up to $60 quick cash at time of purchase.

So long as I don’t mind only getting $60 once per day and so long as I don’t mind paying…..

***22 PERCENT INTEREST on purchases and cash advances.
Actually the interest rate is even better than that. It’s not just a straight 22% interest (okay, in the interests of complete fairness, they didn’t say 22%, they said 21.6%), it’s a variable rate. So I could be paying 22% interest, or I could be paying more! YIPEEE!

I am torn between shredding this sucker and putting it in the worm bin, which is the eventual home of much of the product of my shredder, and using their postage paid envelope to send it back to them accompanied by a note detailing exactly where and exactly how far they can stuff it.

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