Take a look at this picture. It’s a screen-capture from a television ad for Tic Tacs, the ubiquitous one-and-a-half-calorie breath mint in a severely rattly dispenser. (Sorry about the picture quality.)

Take a look at her eyes. That’s not some sort of video artifact; the ad’s creators used CG to give her square pupils.

Now, I’m sure that they had their reasons. Perhaps square pupils tested higher than round in targeted demographic groups. Personally, a waif-like blonde cookie with Futurama-style robot pupils doesn’t ripen my persimmons, but then again, I prefer Altoids.

In fact, the only thing that rhomboid pupils really remind me of is….a goat.

Maybe that was the point; not only do the wierd eyes make you look twice, but their caprine appearance ties into the breath mint theme quite nicely. Perhaps the viewer is supposed to think, “Wow, she’s cute, but she probably has goat breath. Thank goodness for Tic Tacs!”

In other news, I watch too much television.