6/13/2007

I’m No Expert….

Uncle AndrewUncle Andrew
Filed under: @ 9:24 pm

….in the field of search engine optimization. I mean, I’m aware of the basics of how search engines like Google and Yahoo! determine where to rank pages in terms of their relevance to a particular query. Clever stuff, that; way beyond my own skill set.

So perhaps one of my contemporaries with more experience in this field could lend their expertise in answering the question as to just how the fuck my blog got to be the number-one-ranked site on Google for the phrase, “ventilated pith helmets with fan“? I’d really like to know.

Of course, by the time y’all are reading this, my page ranking will probably have dropped. I imagine I’ll have to settle for somewhere in the top five.

The Neologism of Luuuuuuv

Uncle AndrewUncle Andrew
Filed under: @ 7:34 am

I was talking to our housemate on the phone this afternoon, about his new romantic interest. Shawn has been on a bad woman tear–or perhaps a bad-woman tear–for some time now. Abandoned by the baddest (that is to say, the worst) woman in the Universe, he then went on to date a string of women who, irrespective of whether they were or were not bad in and of themselves, were nonetheless bad for him. This new one seems like a real keeper; we wish her and Shawn the best.

Anyhowitzer, Shawn is naturally very cautious with his heart these days. Nonetheless he confessed to me that he thought he was, to quote him, “cautiously head-over-heels in love.”

That turn of phrase made me laugh. If ever there were a self-contradictory expression, “cautiously head-over-heels in love” would seem to be it. There had to be some more semantically appropriate term, something that helped to convey the same dizzy ecstasy but with a more restrained affect to it.

In five seconds I had it. “Dude,” I told him, “You’re not head-over-heels yet. You’re just neck-over-knees.” 🙂


All portions of this site are © Andrew Lenzer, all rights reserved, unless otherwise noted.