12/22/2006

Godless Secular Humanists And The Goblet Of Fi—Er, War On Christmas

Uncle AndrewUncle Andrew
Filed under: @ 10:02 am

As most of you are probably already aware, I listen to a lot of Talk Radio. I sit here in my office/NOC/hamster ball working on projects for my employer, and since I do not have to pay much attention to the phone, I take up my spare mind cycles by listening to NPR, KIRO and KPTK. One of my favorite hosts is Dave Ross, who combines a common-sense approach with a strong streak of mellow good humor. He’s on Monday through Friday, nine to noon.

I’ve noticed a weird trend this year among his callers. About twenty percent of the people who end up on the air begin or end their call with the phrase, “Merry Christmas”. Only they don’t say it like a salutation. There’s this bizarre emphasis to it: “Hey Dave, thanks for taking my call, and Merry Christmas!“. The tone these callers use to enunciate the phrase is strangely strident, kind of snide and aggressive.

It took a couple of instances before I figured out what was going on: these people have appointed themselves the unofficial Guardians of Christmas. No “Happy Holidays” for these people, nosireebob-cat-tail. The holiday is Christmas, and by God (naturally), they’re going to say Merry Christmas, no matter what no liberals or Muslims or faggots have to say about it. Take that, Mister Liberal Media Talk Show Host!

The ironic part of it is that, in taking this particular, smug-yet-angry, defensive-yet-aggressive stance, they are unwittingly deconstructing the premise of the very phrase they claim to be protecting. Never has “Merry Christmas” sounded so much like “Fuck You”.

So much for “Peace on Earth, good will toward men“. 🙄


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